Sunday, July 28, 2013

God's goodness and insight

The last few days have been good days! I got lots done! On Friday, Rachel, her mom, Beth, and I switched our rooms so that I am able to be between the rooms of the 2 students who will be staying on campus this year.  The other day, I found out that I am going to be the dorm counselor, so I am going to be responsible for one boy and one girl who will be staying in the dorm, well 2 girls while Rachel is here ;). So I did some of my unpacking after we moved everything, but I was so tired from moving and trying to get my room arranged, that I decided to wait til the following day.

Beth was leaving yesterday, so her, Rachel, Betsy, and Laurie all went to Old San Juan to enjoy the city before she had to catch her flight home, so that left me with the school practically to myself! There was a Deaf retreat going on this weekend, but they all decided to go somewhere for most of the day, and there is one other girl, Tess, who works here, but she is in the other building so I barely see her unless she needs something or we are all meeting with one another. So I was finally able to get my room in order, all my clothes put away and everything in its place, as for right now (pictures to come). I also made some BBQ chicken, that I was going to have for dinner until I found out we were invited to join the deaf people for dinner. Who would pass up a PR meal AND an opportunity to talk with deaf people?!?! So I just finished my chicken and saved it for today! I was also able to get one of the cabinets in the kitchen cleaned out and the dishes washed, with the help of Rachel!! I felt very accomplished yesterday and am very happy I was able to get all the things I did get done, finished.

While being here alone, I was also able to spend some time with God. I had worship music playing while I was organizing my room, and at one point I just stopped and worshiped.  Just sitting there listening to the music also got me thinking about my life: things I've done, places I've gone, people I've met-those still in my life and those not. Those who used to be really, really close to me and who are now just a friend on Facebook that I occasionally say hi to or comment and/or like something on their page. It sometimes makes me sad. Makes me miss those things, places, people. Makes me wonder if I would've stayed in those close relationships if we would still be so close, or would it have turned out pretty much the same? I wonder if in doing all those things, going all those places, would I still have ended up here? Or would I already have been here and experienced the things that I am going to? Or perhaps I'd be waiting to be here and experience it? If I would've stayed close to those friends, would they have hindered my progress, or would they have helped it, and would I be experiencing this with them? Sometimes, I wish some things could be different. I wish I would still be close to those friends, and have them be a part of my journey on a more personal level. But that isn't how it worked out, and there is a reason for that. I may not know the reason, but the Lord does, and I can't think of those things too much. I am exactly where I am supposed to be because the Lord has ordained this to happen. If I spend too much time thinking about those things, I won't be as good as I can be here. And He wants me to be the BEST I can be! And, for me to give Him my best. So that is what I am going to do.

Today, Rachel, Tess, and I joined the deaf people for their church service here, then we ate lunch with them and did the dishes for them while they cleaned up other things since they were kind enough to feed us. After that, we had a short meeting with Betsy about the VBS that Rachel will be doing the first week of school. When we were finished with that, Rachel and I went with Laurie to the beach for a little. It is so beautiful here. Seriously, everywhere you look, you can find some sort of beauty. The flowers, the beaches, the palm trees, the sky. The sunsets are gorgeous too, painting the sky with all sorts of colors. It really is a true blessing being able to be here and see all these things.

I am starting to miss my family and friends, those I am close with and see on a regular basis. This still doesn't seem real to me. I feel like in a few days/weeks, I will be packing my bags and heading home. Maybe once the students get here and I have a normal schedule, I will feel different. But for now, it just doesn't seem  like this will be my life for the next year. I'm still not sure what that means, but I hope it doesn't make things difficult when I actually do realize it.

God just keeps blessing me, and it is through other people that it is happening. Friday night, while talking with Beth, God gave her some insight about my journey here. I was telling her that I can already tell that this journey is going to be challenging and that I am going to be stretched by some of the things that I will be doing this year. I am a bit concerned about this, but I know God has called me here. He never gives you more than you can handle. After saying this, Beth said to me, "let me tell you what I just saw. When you were talking about being stretched, I saw a band. You know how when you pull on a band, it goes out so far and then comes back to its original shape when you let go? Well, I saw you as a band being stretched so far that you thought you couldn't go anymore, but when it came back to its original shape, it was in the shape of Jesus. He was the One that was being stretched. You may feel it and it may hurt and cause pain, but Jesus will take care of you. You are doing this for God and He is going to stretch you, but Jesus is going to be the One who takes it all for you." <3 

Then, last night, I was talking with Rachel, and she told me that I am inspiring and encouraging to her. We were talking the other day about how I am still single, but I know that God has the perfect man out there for me, and how I am not settling for just anyone, but I am waiting for God to bring him to me. I am holding out for His best. And to her, that was very encouraging. This made my heart smile because sometimes, I get frustrated or upset with the fact that I don't have anyone in my life. But I refuse to settle for second best! God is using my singleness to encourage others, and that makes it be worth it. <3

While listening to my music yesterday, the song "All for Jesus" came on. Here are the lyrics:
Jesus, all for Jesus
All I am and have and ever hope to be
All of my ambitions, hopes, and plans, I surrender these into Your Hands.
For it's only in Your will that I am free, For it's only in Your will that I am free
This whole song encompasses my life right now. I have surrendered my hopes and plans into His hands, and everything that I am doing is for Him. And since I am doing His will, I am free! I love this song and being here has just made me love it even more. Even while here, I make this my prayer.

Father help me give You my best. Let me remember that this is where You want me at this exact time. You didn't want me here earlier or later, but right now. I have a purpose here. I am needed here right now. You have Your reasons of why things worked out the way they did, and no matter what happened, I thank You that I am here, serving You, doing Your work. Guide me, lead me, and give me strength and peace. Thank you for giving me a little bit of Your insight, and for letting me be encouraged by being an encouragement! Let me remember these things often, and praise You for them. I give you my hopes and dreams, my ambitions and plans. Make me free as I walk in Your will for my life, Father.

For those of you who would like my address, here it is. If you are sending a check for me, write it out to the school and put my name in the memo line. If you are sending something just for me (letter, cards, etc),  address  to the school, and "in care of" me. Thank you to all of you who are taking your time to read this and keep up with me. I really appreciate your wanting to know and caring enough to read it! <3
The Evangelical School for the Deaf
HC-01 Buzon 7111
Luquillo PR 00773-9602

Also, here are some photos from our sunrise at the beach the other day when I posted for the first time. Photos of my room and a few other things to come! :) 













































Thursday, July 25, 2013

Morning Glory

Good morning everyone! Today is my 2nd full day here in Puerto Rico and I am really enjoying myself. Monday and Tuesday kind of blended into one as I had a flight to catch Tues morning at 8:10, meaning I had to be at BWI around 6 am, meaning we had to leave around 4 am to get there! Which also meant that I had to leave my house around 2 am to travel with Rachel (a teen who joined us on our trip last year. She is staying 6 weeks this year to help out with thestart of the school year and see how things are run here at ESD) and her mother who is here for 4 days just getting her settled in. I live around 45 mins away from her and they were letting me borrow a suitcase so I wanted to be there early to pack that up! Since I had to leave my house around 2 am, I just didn't sleep! Hence making both days blend together and get me all confused about what day it is today even!

Tues when we arrived, we kind of got settled in, went to the grocery store, and had dinner with the other missionaries here. Yesterday, we went to the beach in the morning, came back for lunch, chatted with one of the students who was here for a meeting, then I cleaned out my dresser, moved it to my new room, and filled it! It was so nice to put some clothes away and know where some of my stuff was! Then we got ready, piled in the van, and went to San Juan to eat dinner and go to Starbucks for a deaf social.

Today, 4 of us, woke up early and went to watch the sunrise on the beach! B.E.A.U.T.I.F.U.L!!! That is why I am up so early! I figured I'd take advantage of the time and get some things done. (Hopefully pictures to come soon.) There is a festival today in town, so we are staying in. Later this morning, we will be putting the chapel back together, since it was just painted recently. There is also going to be a Deaf retreat this weekend, so we have to get things together for that. Then, hopefully, I can move some of the other items from my room now, into my new room. Can't wait for that to be done so I can unpack everything and get organized! I/we also have to clean up the kitchen, so hopefully that can be done this weekend.

Tomorrow is mostly a leisurely day, so I'm not exactly sure what will be going on. Then Sat, Rachel's mom will leave so her, Betsy (the principal), Rachel, and another women who is here for 2 and half weeks, Laurie, will travel to Old San Juan to do some sightseeing, shopping, lunch, etc, before Beth leaves. I get to stay and maybe get some work done and enjoy the deaf people! Then Sunday, we will have deaf church here and probably just relax and get some other things done. No real plans for Sunday.

It has been a good time so far, meeting the other staff, and trying to settle in. This still doesn't feel real to me. I keep having my moments of reality, but one hasn't happened since Tuesday morning. I'm not sure if that is a good thing or not, but I am just going with it for now. This place is beautiful though. I look out my window and see palm trees and beautiful flowers. Just being here just makes me more in awe of who God is and what He has done. I know that I have No IDEA!! what I am getting myself into (especially hearing some of the stories and things I will have to do), and I honestly don't know totally what is going to happen, but I know that I am to be here. I just look outside and see God. You might think that is strange, but you can see Him anywhere, if you just look.

"Thankfulness opens the door to My Presence. Though I am always with you, I have gone to great measures to preserve your freedom of choice. I have placed a door between you and Me, and I have empowered you to open or close that door. There are many ways to open it, but a grateful attitude is one of the most effective..." Jesus Calling, July 24

Thank You Father, for all you have done for me. You have made a way for me to get here, and be here. Thank You for being everywhere. Thank You for allowing me to see you in many things. Lord, I know that You are going to do some amazing things while I am here, and I just ask that You guide and lead me. Be my strength. Be my peace. Thank You for making this all possible. Thank You. Thank You. Thank You.